Apparently, every good blogger needs to make his or her predictions for the tournament and far be it from me to buck the trend. I assume his Truthiness doesn't want to get involved in something so pedestrian. But me? Hell, I ain't proud.
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Group A: Mexico, France - I know, right? France? Really? The funny thing is that a lot of good teams (see: Italy 2006) are forged in the fires of adversity. I think France will be one of them, if they can keep Ribery off the teen girls and Henry's hands in his pockets.
Group B: Argentina, South Korea - S. Korea by virtue of Nigeria and Greece imploding. I don't know why, neither team fills me with confidence.
Group C: England, Slovenia - The U.S. will not make it from this group. They could, but after losing to England, I think there will be a surprise defeat to Slovenia. Because that's how we roll.
Group D: Germany, Australia - Australia over Serbia by virtue of tenacity. Australia won't play pretty, but they'll win.
Group E: Holland, Cameroon - I don't think the Danes or Japanese have it in them to pull an upset.
Group F: Italy, Slovakia - It's a toss up for second between Paraguay and Slovakia, but I think Slovakia will get a draw where Paraguay gets a loss.
Group G: Brazil, Cote d'Ivoire - Portugal and Ivory Coast can duke this one out, but I think African support puts Ivory Coast over the top.
Group H: Spain, Honduras - No, not really Honduras, but second is up in the air in this group, so why not Honduras? It doesn't matter, none of them are beating Brazil next round.
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Mexico over South Korea - Yeah, I hate Mexico winning too, but that's what I see happening.
Argentina over France - Which team was more screwed up coming into the finals? That's debatable, but I think Argentina is a better team on the field.
England over Australia - Because the English are so distraught to be playing in a former colony that they have to take it out on their former colonies.
Germany over Slovenia - No real upsets so far and I don't think this one is the first.
Slovakia over Holland - There's the first upset. I just think the Dutch will trip over themselves.
Cameroon over Italy - Italy's overall age gets to them playing so many games in such succession.
Brazil over Honduras/Whomever - You're shocked, I know.
Spain over Cote d'Ivoire - Or over Portugal. Portugal might actually give them more a game, but Spain will triumph in any case.
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England over Mexico - Closer than their friendly meeting, but I think England prevails.
Argentina over Germany - These are getting tougher to call, but I don't think Germany has performed well against strong opposition.
Brazil over Slovakia - Not even close, Slovakia will have nothing left after defeating the Dutch.
Spain over Cameroon - Sorry, gotta go with the odds on this one.
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Brazil over England - England will play a game that they should win, but manage to blow it.
Spain over Argentina - This is where Maradona fails as a coach. Spain is an equal, if not superior, team and Maradona can't cope with that.
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Spain over Brazil - Spain scares the crap out of me. Spain has enough star power to light Johannesburg for a century, but what's really horrifying is that they play like a club team and combine exceptionally well. Brazil plays well as a team, but not with the attacking lethality of the Spanish.
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So those are my predictions. I don't know that they really are, to be honest. Take this as my take on the most interesting of the plausible scenarios in my brain. If I actually thought this game was close to predictable, I wouldn't bother watching.
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